New Parent Resources

Compiled by Keelia Alder
full-spectrum doula in the sf bay area

If you order any books through the links provided, a portion of the sales will go to Marcus Books, our local bookstore and the country's oldest Black-owned independent bookstore.

Birth

books

The book Expecting Better* breaks down all the main decisions to make surrounding conception & pregnancy, with a hard look at evidence (while staying interesting & accessible) and with a commitment to remaining as objective as possible.

The book The Birth Partner* is especially helpful for partners figuring out how to best support their loved one through pregnancy & birth. It's a thicker one, but it's also written in such a way that you can pick the parts you're most interested in and ignore the others or leave them til later.

The book Baby Making for Every Body is a how-to guide and a celebration of the many ways that folks create families outside of the traditional heterosexual-nuclear-family model. This guide is helpful for anyone who's pregnant/thinking about becoming pregnant, but especially for my fellow queer folks out there. :)

podcasts

To hear parents share their personal birth stories of all types: The Birth Hour* or Birth Stories in Color. I also recommend listening to several different stories (eg. a planned hospital birth with a midwife, an emergency cesarean birth, a planned home birth, etc.).

To hear LGBTQIA+ parents share their pregnancy, birth, and postpartum journeys: Masculine Birth Ritual

websites

To find the latest evidence on all things birth-related: EvidenceBasedBirth.com

To learn more about your legal rights as a birthing person, especially in a hospital setting: Birth Monopoly*

To receive support as a survivor of sexual assault: BirthBruja's birth consultations

For parents wanting to learn more about vaginal birth after cesarean, or VBAC: VBACFacts.com*

To learn more about plus-size pregnancy & birth and how safe and normal it is: PlusSizeBirth.com*

For parents planning a cesarean birth: Penny Simkin's guide to the "Best Cesarean Possible"*

For parents wanting to learn more about cesarean birth or find community with others who have experience with cesarean births: the International Cesarean Awareness Network*

Support for pregnant people who use drugs: HarmReduction.org's toolkit

* Resources listed with an asterisk use gendered language

postpartum

The subjects raised in the book and sample postpartum preparation plan below are excellent and very worth going over with your partner(s), co-parent(s), or community members ahead of time. If your little one has already arrived, these are definitely still going to be extremely helpful!

Free postpartum support & referrals to local resources: Postpartum Support International* (PSI)*
PSI also has free online support groups, with specific programs for Black parents, NICU parents, Spanish-speaking parents, Queer parents and more.
If you fill out their form online, they'll get back to you with a list of all the local groups and resources near you that can better support you. I used this resource after my second kiddo, and it was amazing.

To prepare for the reality of postpartum: the sample postpartum preparation plan by Birthful*

On buying new baby gear for babies/toddlers/kids: Wirecutter's guide*
My two cents: many parents I work with regret buying all new clothes and items for their babies. Most of what you need you can find secondhand from a friendly neighbor (or on Buy Nothing). That saved money can be put towards buying books like...

My favorite book about newborn/baby/toddler sleep: Precious Little Sleep*
(It's my favorite because it includes summaries of all the approaches you'll find in other sleep books. It's also better written, better organized and more comprehensive.)

My favorite postpartum preparation book: The First Forty Days*

Free emotional support for parents: National Parent Helpline, 855-427-2736

* Resources listed with an asterisk use gendered language

Breast/Chestfeeding

Free support in finding a lactation consultant covered by your insurance: The Lactation NetworkFree breast/chestfeeding phone support:
Nursing Mothers Counsel*

Here are my favorite short, informative videos on how to bodyfeed (note that all include gendered language):- Attaching Your Baby at the Breast
- What to Do About Nipple Pain
- Positions for Breast/ChestfeedingHere are more videos* about subjects like whether your baby is getting enough milk.

* Resources listed with an asterisk use gendered language

Contact

Feel free to reach out if you have any questions, or if you have a good idea of a resource to add to the list! You can also let me know if you'd like resources around pregnancy loss, abortion, or social services.

Thank you

I'll get back to you as soon as I can.